On Daddy Issues.

According to attachment theory, our attachment styles in adult relationships were established when we were mere babes, based on our relationships with our primary caregivers, or parents. I just realized that this year I’m working through my relationships with my parents through my relationships with men. The idea of daddy issues suddenly popped up for […]

On giving yourself permission…to be bad.

When I reflect on the tumultuous romantic relationships I’ve had in 2013, I realize that there’s a huge theme here. For the first time in my life, I’m allowing myself to get involved with the following (THIS IS SO NOT ME): politically incorrect men; masculine men with high sex drives; “married men”; emotionally unavailable men; […]

On Casual Sex.

It’s been over a week since I had that God-awful experience with “married guy” and my reflections have been plenty. But today’s reflective question which keeps spiraling around my thoughts is, since when did casual sex = treating people shit??? The second time I hung out with “married guy” after meeting him at this club […]

On Shame.

I feel sad, disappointed and a bit shamed. I slept with the “married guy” last night. After coming clean about why sometimes I resist him. Told him I was looking for something more real. He’s not. I said that I needed to keep it really casual between us because I didn’t want to be emotionally […]

On sleeping with a married man. Part I.

I’m not sure it’s true. Someone he knew mentioned a wife to my friend the night I met him. But the way he was on the hunt that night and the way he acts I mean…I just can’t believe he’s married. Divorced, separated, a girlfriend perhaps…but there’s no way he’s in a committed relationship with […]

On match.com

Okay, so I’m a seasoned online dater. I’ve tried all the big sites (Plenty of fish, Ok Cupid & Lava life) on and off for 6 years now, with varying degrees of success. Well, online dating has gotten me some great lovers, plenty of dates and allowed me to meet some really nice people. I’m […]

On Dating in your Thirties.

I’m learning very quickly that dating in your Thirties is a whole different ballgame. People are much more likely going to state what they’re looking for at the outset: on the first date; or on their online dating profile! And, if you don’t fall within the parameters of their criteria, you don’t really have a […]

On Text Messages.

How is it that I’m Thirty years old and I’m still: – Asking 4¬†friends what they think about me texting the guy first after our first date – Writing 2 different drafts of the text message to my girlfriend before sending it out – Running his response text by 4 friends – Reacting super sensitively […]

On not acting out of fear.

If you read my first blog post ever, On Companionship, you’ll note that this year I’m truly open to the possibility of love.¬†At the same time, I don’t expect it to happen anytime soon and have decided that along the way I need companionship, which includes dates, new friendships and sex. Part of being open, […]

On Sleepovers.

What’s the general rule of thumb around sleepovers? On my last date, my date and I had sex. I live alone. The date was at my apartment. We finished at around 12:30pm. I had work the next day. My date was a student, and therefore less concerned with being alert during the hours of 9 […]